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Anonymous: shit day, my boy took a break with me because I have mental illnesses and he said this will force me into recovery... it's made me worse... he said he will get beck together with me if i get better ( go into recovery for my ED bipolar ect.) i honestly want to die...

It sounds like to me he’s taking a break in the relationship not for himself, but for you. He’s being really selfless saying he wants you to focus on yourself (rather than him) so you can get well. I have no idea what kind of relationship you guys have built together or how serious y’all may be, but it really does sound like he loves you. If you are really close, I can understand how you feel completely alone when he makes a decision like this. Especially when you are really struggling.¬†

With that aside, it sounds like you are going through a lot. Battling yourself day to day is one of the most exhausting things you can do in your life. & I only know that because I am speaking from experience. I too have struggled with an ED & other diagnoses… Such as anxiety, depression, PTSD, borderline… I mean ANYONE can put a label on you. It’s really up to you if you want to let those “labels” define you as a person… Or you can embrace your struggle, get over the hurdle & try to continue forward instead of stagnant in your past or not so glamorous present.¬†

I also know what it feels like wanting to die… & that’s all it is.. A feeling! It passes!!! I swear to you. It really is like the cliche… Feelings are like passing weather, the storm will pass & the sun WILL shine. If he wants you to get help, I assure you that he wants to see you happy. I want to see you happy & I am sure all your family & friends do too. If you have a best friend to talk with or vent to I would suggest doing that tonight… & if you can’t muster up the energy to do that, then go look at some cute pictures of baby animals, watch a disney movie, color, take a bath, listen to your favorite album, eat some chocolate…. DO IT ALL AT THE SAME TIME! LOL (That would be me, haha). Or maybe lie down & try to fall asleep so you can start fresh tomorrow. & if none of those suggestions sound good to you, you can always unload on me… I mean I don’t know who you are, but when it comes down to it we are all human & I promise we’ve all been there.¬†

Keep your head up, stay strong. Say, “I love you” to yourself, even if you don’t believe it. Say it once every day & one day you will.¬†

If you are having a bad day tell me what is on your mind. Anonymous or not. Even if your day is shit & you feel like no one is there for you, remember even a stranger cares about your happiness. Everyone deserves it.

You’re a different human being to everybody you meet.

- Chuck Palahniuk  (via putthefuninfuneral)

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